Choose Hope

So, I found out there is an awareness ribbon for Head and Neck Cancers. It is burgundy and ivory! (And now I will put this song in your head: "Burgundy and Ivory, go together in perfect harmony". I have to share because I sing this song everytime I say those colors now :P) I found this on a great website too: www.choosehope.com. Everything you buy goes towards cancer research, so feel free to check it out! I'm gonna go crazy on April 2nd (once I get paid...!). First thing in my cart will be the "Survivor" burgundy and ivory pin! ;)

I figa it out

April 21st - Last Chemo treatment!
April 26th - Last Radiation treatment!

BRING IT ON!!!!!!!!

(Crossing my fingers that doesn't change!)

And it begins...

Went to see "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" with Charles, Ian, and our friends, Keni, Chris, Cami, and Ali. That movie was hillarious! I think Chris had flashbacks from his middle school years but made it out with only a couple cold sweats ;) I was excited to get a big bucket of popcorn layered with that oily substance they refer to as "butter" and enjoy. Turns out this is exactly when my tastebuds decided to go flat... :( I could feel the butter and its greasy goodness but no real flavor. So disappointed... But the movie was funny so that kept my mind off it a little bit. During the movie the main kid was trying to gain 10lbs in a week so he could go from being a "chihuahua" to a "bulldog" on the wrestling team. So he loaded up his plate with mashed potatoes. Now, if you know me mashed potatoes is like heaven on a plate. So I had a serious craving after that.

Keni and I had made plans to go get pedi's after the show. I thought I would be different and go with a nice brown color. Now that should have been my first clue that it was "brown" and shouldn't be putting it on my toes. But I did it anyway.... Yeah, it looked like I had little turds on my toes. So, I had to have the color changed. Of course it was getting closer to closing time so my nail tech, Lisa, was prone to giving me a bunch of crap about waiting until she was nearly done painting my toenails. ;) So Keni decided now was a good time to drop the Cancer Card and it worked ;) hehe We even got free flowers on our toes! ;) Sometimes you just gotta take advantage ;)

Then we went out to dinner to Cracker Barrell since I still couldn't get the mashed potatoes out of my mind...! I got my usual Chicken fried chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans and corn. I was sooooooo excited! And it was good but a little flat... :( Such a waste! But I still nearly licked the plate clean, even if I was mostly imagining how good it was tasting. Oh well, it was a good evening and had a lot of fun. Even got to see my friend, Sam, for his birthday for a little bit and watch some of "Candide". We skipped through a lot of it so I'm gonna have to take some time to watch it start to finish so I can understand more of the story ;) But Kristen Chenoweth is just amazing. Still can't imagine being able to sing that high! Wow - Speaking of, some day I will see "Wicked" too! ;) Maybe even in San Francisco!

Happy St. Patty's!

Happy St. Patty's day to you! Today was my first chemo treatment and my second radiation treatment. Radiation is pretty easy really. I go in the back door, the doctors meet me there and take me into this big room and lay me down on a very  hard table. It's just like a table they put you on for an x-ray for CT or MRI. Then they put my mask on me and strap it and me down to the table. The doctors walk out and put on Jack Johnson for me and then it begins. I hear buzzing for about 10-20 seconds each time the radiation beams are on. And I am usually done within 10 mins. I have a bit of dry mouth but that is the only side effect so far. I just keep water with me at all times.
I then headed over today for my chemo appointment. I met with the doctor beforehand to get any questions answered and my anti-nausea prescriptions (yes, there are two. that way I can alternate if needed every 3 hours. Bless them!) I got taken back to the chemo room where there are two rows of recliners facing each other and scattered patients receiving treatment. I got comfortable and the nurse that was taking care of me had a student with her. They asked if I would mind if she started my IV and I'm always willing to help. She is in her last semester and she seemed pretty confident. Well, it didn't work out... :( Turns out I have "tiny" veins. So, with the IV needle in my arm they "fished" around for my "tiny" vein and then decided to try again. Still nothing. Another "seasoned nurse" come over and placed the IV in and things started cruising (of course she had to remind me to breathe when she was putting my IV in :P Those suckers hurt!) About an hour into it, I was just getting the potassium after the Anti-nausea drip and had to go to the bathroom for the 3rd time (seriously, drinking 2 quarts of water does this to you. They are gonna have to stock up on bathroom tissue during my appts!), and went to wash my hands and notice blood and fluid dripping down from my bandage of my IV... Needless to say, they had to get yet ANOTHER nurse to do yet ANOTHER IV needle. My only "good" vein is in the bend of my elbow where I normally get blood taken from. So now I am one-handed :P And that is even more interesting having to go the bathroom another 10 times in the next 2 hours of treatment and getting undressed and dressed with one hand ;) It's all good though! I was just glad to get it done :) I'm on my way to kickin my evil twin's ass!
And it is pretty boring sitting there for 4 hours and Charles did go with me the whole time. I am so glad to have him there. He is such a strong support for me and I love him to bits! Thankfully there was also wifi and he was able to get some work done too, so it was productive for both of us :) By the way ladies from my office...Soduku is freakin hard! I could not figure it out :P Someone will have to teach me. I read the instructions, it just didn't make any sense. I didn't even have chemo brain yet ;)

And it begins...

I got all set up for my radiation treatments to begin. They start tomorrow, March 16th, at 9:15 am. I have some anxiety about it, of course, but ready to get this done and over with. See ya later Cancer! My first chemotherapy appt is on Wednesday, March 17th. Happy St. Patrick's Day to me ;) The picture is my "Spider-Man" mask to keep me in place during the radiation treatments. The hard part is getting set up in the correct position. (And I guess I should mention that this isn't my actual rendering of the mask, just a picture I found that looks just like it) If I can get Charles or someone else to get a picture of me in mine, I will post it. The after picture would be good too. I have waffle face and neck for a good 20 minutes after the mask is taken off. It is a very tight squeeze in there but necessary to keep me in place. Don't need to radiate my chin or eyes ;) When I got fitted for the mask it wasn't too bad. I was able to breathe and find my happy place once I realized I really couldn't move at all. They had Jack Johnson going for me this morning for the "dress rehearsal" so that was really nice. I won't lie, it is a bit uncomfortable and I did start to panic towards the end. Thankfully the dress rehearsal was double what the actual treatment time will be so I should be able to make it just fine. And I just found out that Jack Johnson is coming to Usana on August 13th. Definitely kickin Cancer's ass to make that show! ;) Sitting in the front row too! Ha!

Say it isn't so...

I am reading Lance Armstrong's "It's not about the Bike" and he mentioned he had to give up coffee... A definite question for my doctor. I imagine she is going to say that I should considering they want me to drink 2 quarts of water a day since the chemo drug is really hard on my kidneys and bladder. And coffee does dehydrate you... Maybe I will just have to up the water, eh? I've already given up alcohol, this is just mean... :P

"Good Luck! See your tastebuds in 2 months" Lunch

A few of my favorite co-workers took me to lunch on Friday, March 12th for a "Good luck, see your tastebuds in 2 months" lunch. My last day is not until April 1st but I start treatment on Wednesday, the 17th and found out that I will lose my tastebuds starting in the second week of treatment. So this was my farewell and good luck lunch early in anticipation of that. It was a blast to say the least. Starting with a group of 22 people (you love me, you really do!) and the hostess introducing the waiters inquiring about the occassion (Uh...). We did end up telling her that I was going to have chemo for the next couple months and she even offered to sing to me. Hess was first up to start with "Happy Cancer to you!" sung to the tune of "Happy Birthday", so that was a laugh! We all thought that maybe the lunch could be compted (sp?) by the company and came up with a plan to use a sympathy picture of my lump on my neck and me giving my best "booboo lip" ;) We didn't end up hearing from our General Manager but it was compted (sp?) anyway (Thanks Ron!). Our finance manager and also a really good guy in general, Ron, said a couple really wonderful things about me and I thanked all of the wonderful people there for attending my lunch. I did run into some old friends from my previous employer, Lumenis, at the OG too. Polly is a cancer survivor and gave me some great words of encouragement and it was really good to see all of them! I work with some of the best and funniest people ever and it pretty much rocks!! Thanks again!

Squamous Cell Carcinoma

That is the type of cancer I have. It is related to the HPV virus that has caused a raucous with its more common relationship to cervical cancer. I am lucky enough to have the really rare strain of HPV that causes head and neck cancer in young women. I guess it's true... I am special ;) The "good" news is that having HPV positive SCC is highly responsive to chemo and radiation and my cure rate goes up to 90% (from 70% of HPV negative SCC). It is going to be a rough couple months of treatment and side effects but a small bump in the road to a long life with my wonderful family and friends. Thank you all for your support, love and care. Keep in touch because I am sure there will be times when I am going to need a good motivational speech! ;)

Cancer Sucks